Final Paper

Natalie Fisher

Dr. Kirsten Kaschock

English 102

Due: March 11, 2016

Life as the Youngest Child

After watching shows on TV and movies that involve families, it seems that the youngest is known for being the “baby” of the family and gets special treatment from the parents or even older siblings. This can be an act of trouble or an act of courage. Some media examples that show examples of this are Full House when Michelle uses her cuteness to get away with anything or even when Katniss volunteers for Primrose in the Hunger Games because she wants to protect her little sister. These stereotypes can be true at times; it shouldn't be what the youngest child is known for. This shouldn’t be the way the youngest child is being judged.  Being the youngest child is more than being the “baby” of the family, fighting with the older siblings, and getting special treatment. It is about learning from your older siblings, following their footprints where they succeed and changing paths where they make mistakes. It is about rebelling from the “baby” title and doing things your way. Parents can treat you like the baby and give you special treatment; at other times, they let you get away with things because they are used to parenting and not scared anymore. I am the youngest, and I have met other youngest children who break the stereotypes.

Some rumors and shows show that siblings do not get along. In 27 Dresses the movie focuses on the sibling rivalry where the oldest sister is jealous of the younger sister for getting farther in life. As well as media, I have heard people I know talk about how they fight with their siblings a great deal of the time. They do not get along unless they take the time to resolve their issues. In reality, not all siblings fight all the time. Sometimes they fight, but not 24/7. Full House is an excellent example of this. In the show, the sisters will fight, but in the end, they always are there to each other. Michelle has her two older sister who she looks up to. There was an episode where Stephanie began to notice how much Michelle copied her. But that was Michelle’s way of showing Stephanie that she is her role model. “So when Michelle started copying Stephanie's every move in the Season 4 episode "Good News, Bad News," it may have been part of a game — but for little sisters, copying our older siblings when we are kids is part of a lifestyle” (Bowman). When younger siblings copy their older siblings, it means the older sibling is probably doing something right. Younger siblings look up to their older siblings for guidance or because they inspire to be like them. I know I am like this with my sisters.

I have done some research and figured out I am not the only one who, most of the time, gets along with my siblings. I came upon an article by Erica Loop, who has her Master of Science in applied developmental psychology from the University of Pittsburgh's School of Education. She has been writing articles about child development and parenting since 2009. She has a lot to say about how older siblings are the inspiration for younger siblings.  “Unlike parents who may try to teach kids about social graces or acting politely, an older sibling can show her little brother or sister how to interact with other children at school or in other similar types of social situations” (Loop).  Siblings can be the perfect role models because they understand what their younger sibling is going through. Even though parents have already been through it, things change throughout generations, and the older sibling can help out more. The younger sibling can watch their older sibling grow up and see what they have done well and what they have done not so well. “This type of positive role modeling can go on into the teen and even adult years, with younger siblings watching their older brothers and sisters for cues on how to act in situations that range from the high school homecoming dance to a night out at a dance club with friends” (Loop). They can watch how their siblings act and how the handle situations. The older sibling can help them with more than just how to act in social situations. They can help with school, how to do well in an interview (if the older sibling has a job), and a lot more. The older sibling can help them grow. “From children to adults, imitating a positive older role model offers introductions to new experiences and provides a guideline to follow” (Loop).  Imitating a positive role model can lead to a great relationship. My siblings are my role models. I go to them for help, and I watch carefully where the succeed. I follow their footprints they have paved for me. I am not the only one who is this grateful.

I interviewed a close friend of mine who is also the youngest. He relates to what it feels like to have siblings who act as role models and help him along the way. I asked him what it was like for him to have three older siblings, this was his response. “Overall, they’ve just made my life easier by pathing an easier road for me. They’ve all been through what I'm going through now so whenever I need am I need of help or have a question, I can always rely on them” (Arfuso). It is the best feeling when siblings can be there for you. I know for me, it has relieved a lot of stress. Knowing someone is there for me who knows exactly what to do and how to help me succeed is incredible. I am so grateful for my older siblings. But sometimes since I am the youngest, the look down on me and treat me like the baby. This is because the youngest tends to be known as the “baby of the family.”

I am the youngest of two sisters. We will fight at times, but we mainly get along. The times we do fight are chaotic. The main things my sister and I would fight about would be clothes and chores. For clothes, it would be because she wore my shirt or I wore her pants. As any sister would we fought over silly things like that. This made me very upset because she would say hurtful things to me. When she realized, I got angry she would start calling me a baby. She would proceed with her argument that I was a baby and since I am the youngest I will always act like a child. This would make me very upset. I did not want to be seen as a child. I think of myself as a very mature person, and I feel as if I gain in maturity each day. My sisters also treat me like a baby. They rarely let me home alone without making sure I am ok, they never want me to be the driver if we have to go somewhere, and they never trust me with big responsibilities. I think it is because they are protective of me, but at the same time, it hurts. It seems they don’t trust me. As I get older, they begin to trust me more. I try to prove to them day by day how mature I am. I show them by taking care of my dogs when I am home alone; I  run errands for myself, and I pick up stuff they need, and more. Being known as the baby can be one of the most annoying things about being the youngest, but I am beginning to show them I am not a baby.

I am not the only one that feels this way. My interviewee, Stephen Arfuso, can relate. I asked him since he is the youngest if he was also known as the baby of the family. “Yes, no matter how old I get I will always be the baby. At 18, I am still the baby and get the most attention” (Arfuso). Sometimes people’s siblings treat them as the baby, but other times the parents treat them like the baby.  Sometimes parents do show a lot of attention to the youngest child because they are the last child. Being the youngest means we are the last to do a lot of things. We are the last to graduate, get our license, and to grow up. It becomes sad for a parent. My mom would always talk about how if I were going through something big in life, such as get my license, which this was the last time she will watch her child get their license. Since she felt upset, she would always act as if I am still a baby. She once told me she did this because it is sad watching me grow up.

It is hard to judge how parents raise their child because every parent has their technique. Television shows make it that the youngest is known as the baby. Full house is an example of this because of the way Michelle Tanner gets treated. “She taught me how to make my cuteness work as long as it lasted, how to turn guilting my older siblings into playing with me into an art form, and how to deal with the less desirable parts of being the baby of the family... like forever being referred to as the baby of the family” (Bowman).  Michelle Tanner, the youngest daughter of Full House, shows the stereotype of being the youngest. She is treated like a baby in most episodes, and she uses the stereotype to get away with certain situations. Not all children are like Michelle Tanner, but other kids do get referred to as the baby, or they get special treatment. Like Michelle Tanner, some youngest children want the attention of the family. “The third child receives similar treatment to the second child, but the youngest child is more apt to overcome the competition between siblings and to establish his or her importance in the family” (Cundiff).  The youngest is known to want the attention, and this frequently leads to the stereotype of being the baby. They want to be known, and they wish to be the star of the family. I have seen this first hand myself because I would act like this. I would try to outshine my older siblings. This is the way I was raised, and I wasn’t the only one raised this way. A woman named Denise Schipani has done her research on how siblings act with each other depending on their birth order. Most of her actions with the youngest talked a lot about how they treated like a child. “The baby of the family tends to be the type who needs attention; the firstborn, who was alone for a while in the family, doesn't need to seek attention, because he or she usually got it..." (Schipani). The youngest gets the attention most of the time because of the fact that they are the youngest. The parent’s give them special treatment at times because this is the last time they can watch their child grow up. The youngest is so used to the attention that they beg for more.

The stereotypes of being the youngest child seem unreal. It seems like children make them up or TV shows just happen to make all the youngest children act like they are spoiled, immature, and more. Patrick Cundiff has studied the relationship between juvenile delinquency and birth order. Throughout his studies, he has informed us of the rebellion of the youngest child because of the particular attention. “While the youngest child is characterized as more extroverted than older siblings, youngest children generally tend to have low acceptance of responsibility” (Cundiff). Since the youngest child can granted special treatment, they feel the need not to take on a lot of responsibility. They feel the need their parents will let them off easily if they do not complete the work since they’re the “baby.” “And if older siblings baby the baby, lastborns might be spoiled and manipulative” (Lorenzi). If they are treated younger by both their parents and siblings, they will get used to the attention. They grew up used to being in the spotlight, and this will affect their personality. Parents will go easier on the child because of the special attention .“Parents tend to let things slide once the last child comes along -- they aren't nervous, first-time parents anymore. As a result, lastborns usually do get away with more than their siblings do ...” (Lorenzi).  Parents start going easier on the youngest because they had seen some of the outcomes when they harshly punished them. My interviewee also agrees with this statement. I asked him if he had special treatment while growing up, this was his response. “I would like to think so. They are more lenient with me and tend to have a longer leash with me. I get my way with them more often than my sisters do and they are a lot easier on me with punishments” (Arfuso).  Parents learn more and more when they have more experience raising a child. Once they get to the last child, they gained all the experience and get more familiar to parenting. Overall, they treat the youngest just like their other kids. That is what my mother would do. She would always tell me how everyone should be treated equally.

Being the youngest has many pros and cons, but the stereotypes that movies and other children show are not real for all. Not all siblings fight. Siblings are there for each other and role models for the younger siblings. Not all of the youngest children act like babies. They may get treated like a baby by their parents or siblings, but not all of them act like babies. Not all youngest children get special treatment. The parents might get upset that they are raising their last kid, but not all the kids experience the special treatment. Every person is different. Some people experience the same identity, but they don’t all act in the same way.

Works Cited

Arfuso, Stephen. "Being the Youngest Sibling." Telephone interview. 28 Jan. 2016.

Bowman, Sabienna. "7 Times Michelle Tanner From 'Full House' Defined What It Means To Be The Little Sister." Bustle. N.p., 27 Apr. 2015. Web. 01 Mar. 2016.

Cundiff, Patrick R. "Ordered Delinquency: The “Effects” of Birth Order on Delinquency." Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin 39.8 (2013): 1017-29. Web.

Loop, Erica. "List of Examples of Older Siblings Being Positive Role Models." Everyday Life. Demand Media, n.d. Web. 01 Mar. 2016.

Lorenzi, Natalie. "How Birth Order Shapes Personality." Parents.com. Meredith Women’s Network, 2016. Web. 10 Feb. 2016.

Schipani, Denise. "How Does Birth Order Affect Relationships?" Woman's Day. Hearst Communications, 28 May 2010. Web. 02 Feb. 2016.